To be impassioned is to feel alive

Writer's Block: Little Women

2008-11-29T17:18:29Z

Fans of Little Women often divide along Jo/Amy lines. Jo was independent and smart, but Amy always seemed to get what she wanted and have more fun. Are you in the Jo camp or the Amy camp?

View 500 Answers

Jo March is definitley one of my favorite female protagonists. She's awesome. Amy is a spoiled, selfish, little brat. Amy should've died instead of Beth, but alas, I'm not Louisa May Alcott.

fadedmemory @ 2008-11-11T03:59:00

2008-11-11T08:59:16Z

You are The Empress
Beauty, happiness, pleasure, success, luxury, dissipation.
The Empress is associated with Venus, the feminine planet, so it represents, beauty, charm, pleasure, luxury, and delight. You may be good at home decorating, art or anything to do with making things beautiful.
The Empress is a creator, be it creation of life, of romance, of art or business. While the Magician is the primal spark, the idea made real, and the High Priestess is the one who gives the idea a form, the Empress is the womb where it gestates and grows till it is ready to be born. This is why her symbol is Venus, goddess of beautiful things as well as love. Even so, the Empress is more Demeter, goddess of abundance, then sensual Venus. She is the giver of Earthly gifts, yet at the same time, she can, in anger withhold, as Demeter did when her daughter, Persephone, was kidnapped. In fury and grief, she kept the Earth barren till her child was returned to her.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

fadedmemory @ 2008-09-17T14:23:00

2008-09-17T18:23:05Z

No Regrets

2008-07-30T15:31:18Z

Silently awaiting
calls beneath the sea
I dream a dream
that only I can see

Cries of the deep
mask the sorrow of the weary
and all that is missing
has long been forgotten

Layer by Layer
Excavations reveal
a secret so devastating
the reality can't be real

you thought that you knew her
you thought things were fine
you thought and you thought
that you had plenty of time

but everyone's time clock
is ticking away
ever so slowly
til that one long sweet day
when everything feels like the movies
and surreality smacks you in the face

you feel yourself bleeding
its the only way you know
the pain is so real, as you watch it all flow
truth lies in sadness
fear lies in pain
and really
will they even remember your name

Layer by Layer
Excavations reveal
a secret so devastating
the reality can't be real

Silently awaiting
calls beneath the sea
I dream a dream
that only I can see

A look in the mirror
reflects only whats real
The shadow you see
has lost all its appeal
barely recognizable as you stumble ahead
looking for something to shut off your head
the thoughts keep on reeling
do it, they say
you've come this far - why not go all the way

Regrets run deeper than the veins you have severed
Your tear-covered face is cold and weathered
what are you afraid of
what could be worse
then living here with this curse

you close your eyes
and hold your breath
it won't be long now.

fadedmemory @ 2008-06-12T00:20:00

2008-06-12T04:21:34Z

Talking to the cops is FUN. You should try it sometime.

Filing Police Reports FTW! :\

fadedmemory @ 2008-06-10T22:21:00

2008-06-11T02:29:33Z

im fucking hot.

im also lazy as shit.
i have no interest in updating the way you all do. I used to do it a lot, on GJ - at one point, several years ago.

Maybe i just over-did it.

Not sure.

I have a little story about my aunt, the stupid slutty mother fucking cunt. Bitch has issues, seriously OHMAHGOD. so anyway i come home from my the movies with my demonic cousin and she comes out of her cave (aka her 'computer room' that smells like a Bar/Pub) and tells me that she 'IS GOING TO ASK ME NICELY NOT TO THROW GARBAGE OUT OF MY CAR and LEAVE IT ON THE GROUND'

and i was like 'uh...i didnt' and she was all 'i found a schedule' and i was like 'Okay and it probably fell out' and she said 'yeah, uh huh' and i was just thinking ...Um hi, obviously if its a schedule I need it you inbreed twat.

BTW The schedule that she found was a SCHOOL SCHEDULE. One would assume, as I am now enrolled school, that I would need the schedule and would not toss it ouf of my car, no? it's called common sense, but try telling that to the little cuntnugget.

So i told her she better learn how to ask fucking questions correctly because thats not how you do it and she didnt say anything except -cough- 'IF it fell then okay' like I need her approval of my story? IF it fell, my ass!

SO anyway, I decided to write out a little Guide on how to ask questions in a civilized society. I was fucking brutal, and I'm gonna type it out and send it to her. I'm also gonna post it on here, probably tomorrow. Like I said, it's brutal - my dumbass father said i should edit it a bit or she might cry/off herself/whatever.

When I remember to take it out of my car. Did I mention that its like 175 degrees? CAUTION: LAZYNESS ENSUES.

So anyway like I said, I'm going to college now, or whatever. Taking one class for the summer, Medieval History. Once fall comes I'll have a regular schedule.

I'm also looking for a new job. funfun. the bank was not the right place for me. I couldn't stand it.

yeah btw, i'm really angsty and bitter tonight with a nice mix of 'i hate everyone kindly throw yourself off the nearest bridge' tonight.

516 728 3699
incase anyone wants to ~~stalk~~ call me.

Voice Post

2008-06-08T02:10:11Z

fadedmemory @ 2008-05-31T22:32:00

2008-06-01T02:33:35Z

Does anyone know of any AUDIO BOOK communities that don't require you to be invited? or does anyone belong to one and can invite/vouch-for me?

I adore audio books, and I'm currently lacking in new ones.

fadedmemory @ 2008-03-19T15:02:00

2008-03-19T19:06:05Z

Question: Loyal Aushole here. I'm wondering what's up with the CW's 90210 spin-off. Any news if they've ordered a pilot? — Dawn
Ausiello: They've ordered a script and only a script. Of course, they've commissioned Rob Thomas to pen it, so a pilot pickup is pretty much a foregone conclusion. The only question now is which members of the original cast will be making the leap to 90210: The Next Gen. "They're still figuring out what the link will be," says one insider, "but there will be a link." Not sure if this is worth reading into, but I hear the last name of one of the teen characters rhymes with Filver. Hmmm….

OH my fucking god. this could be quite the travesty. sigh. bastards. and how would david and donna have a teenaged kid when they got married in 2000, that would make their kid 8, 9 or 10 depending on when the show debuts! WTF >:o Oh wait...unless it's about Erin, how old would she be....92....16. BUT WHO CARES ABOUT ERIN TAYLOR SILVER? >:o

fadedmemory @ 2008-03-17T09:49:00

2008-03-17T13:57:50Z

The woman from HR called today and I got the job. I have to be at HR tomorrow at 930 [OMG early :\ my sleep schedule sucksss] and be fingerprinted and have my picture taken for an ID card and get the drug testing information [UGH hate drug tests they're a nuisance]

then I would start on the 24th, I would have to go to HR first and then to my branch at 11 or 1130. I HOPE they get that i'm taking the bus since I dont have a car yet and getting from HR (woodbury) to the branch (not-woodbury) is a little difficult since buses dont even go to woodbury (cab to train station then a bus to branch) so i wouldn't get their in like 5 minutes.

I have a week to figure out my transportation situation, guess that means I have to buy a car, rent one, or work with the buses...

I also don't know what to tell them about April 5th and 12th since there's absolutely no way I can work then. I have to take my GED test on those two days but if I tell them that I'm taking it that they might be like WTF we don't want you here. I didn't lie on the application or anything, even though a diploma or GED is required. It asked how much schooling I've had, where I went and if I receieved a degree. So how do I tell them I can not work those days without telling them why?

The test is from like 800-2:30 and my hours would be like 815-3:45 so yeah there's no way around it. They do make the schedule a month in advance so I wouldn't even be on there yet. They also said that if I work saturday's ill have a random day off [tuesday-friday] and sunday. if I don't then i'm off saturday and sunday.

fadedmemory @ 2008-03-13T20:39:00

2008-03-14T00:48:43Z

I had my interview today with NYCB's HR. I guess I did well because I now have a meeting with the branch manager tomorrow which I THINK/HOPE means that assuming nothing goes HORRIBLY WRONG [-crosses fingers-] i'll be working at the bank sometime within the next week. :o I've been wanting a bank job for awhile...so actually getting something that I want is kind of weird. It just kind of seems to be falling in to place. I'm not saying this is my career choice or anything, but it's something I could see myself doing for awhile. I'm almost positive it will be worlds better than best buy. I'll be working uh....a mile and a 1/2 away from where Mike lives & works...not that that matters O.o or anything it's just a huge (and I'm hoping good) coincidence.

I haven't even told mike yet but I want to. He works at commerce (which is where I wanted to work originally) but hell, a bank job is a bank job I guess. He tells me all the time that the job really isn't difficult and he enjoys it enough to stay. I applied to NYCB on a whim (through a another website). They had a job fair posting up and i just clicked 'apply' even though it didn't say to...and well, yeah, the HR rep called me back and thats basically it...

I hope the Xanax doesn't show up on my drug test. I took 5 in like November and haven't taken it since. I did get them from my old doctor (still have the bottle with like 16 pills and his name on it) but I realized I didn't want to work through my shit using a crutch like that if I didn't have to.

I'll be working on a computer which um hi makes my life right now because it's not working on a register (-loathes-) and i'm probably getting WAY ahead of myself...

so my question is...if I'm meeting the branch manager does that mean I've basically got the job? that's what Dixy, Chris & my father think.

fadedmemory @ 2008-03-11T01:50:00

2008-03-11T06:13:03Z

1. How old were you in 1980?
-4

2. How old were you in 1989?
turned 5 on the last day of that year.

3. Were you a Toys 'R' Us kid?
I definitley had my moments.

4. Did you watch Transformers?
nope

5. Did you see E.T. on the big screen?
I saw it on the big screen in re-release, but i've never liked E.T.

6. Did you own a Lite Brite?
Nope

7. Who is your favorite Golden Girl?
Sophia but i'm not really a fan.

8. When someone says "Who you gonna call?" you think?
Eddie Murphy & Bill Murray

9. What was your favorite toy?
Cherry Merry Muffin, Kid sister, Teddy ruxpin,

10. Did you have a Pogo Ball?
No :[

11. Did you listen to New Kids on the Block?
yes, I was little but my neighbor was 13 and she gave me all her new kids stuff. <333 joey mcintyre (and met him twice when he was in wicked, but I'm not a fan girl or anything...)

12. What New Kid did you have a crush on?
um hi D: Joey

13. Did you play M.A.S.H?
Of course i did. a lot. my books were filled with mash :\

14. Did you watch The Care Bears?
Do the carebear count down 5 4 3 2 1

15. Did you have jelly bracelets?
mhm

16. Did you ever own a slap bracelet?
a few...orange, green

17. The Breakfast Club or Sixteen Candles?
The breakfast club. bender was such a badass. ugh. <3

18. Did you have a crazy hair style? Not really, just a little girl haircut [shoulder length with full bangs]

19. What was your first bike?
pink >:o they were all pink til i was like 12... i really loathe pink.

20. Name one thing you still own from your childhood?
Samantha, my american girl doll, but she's from the 90s.

21. Did you have a Cabbage Patch Kid?
no, i thought they were the ugliest things ever.

22. Rainbow Brite or Strawberry Shortcake?
neither

23. Did you watch Miami Vice?
No I prefered 21 Jumpstreet

24. Did you own a Trapper Keeper?
yes when I turned 10 I HAD TO GET A TRAPPER KEEPER, it was pink and blue and had green, orange and purple 3d images on it. I was 'SOOOOOOOO COOOOL' except the paper always tore out and it was a pain in the ass.

25. Atari or Nintendo?
I had both but preferred nintendo.

26. Did you play Pac-Man?
yeah but i never liked it that much.

27. Which was better: Jem and The Holograms or Barbie and The Rockers?
Well as much as I liked barbie when I was little Jem was AMAZING. we used to play Jem in the school yard. I have a Jem shirt (from junkfood i believe) that I wear to this day. infact this is in but mine is like lavender ... http://truffleshuffle.co.uk/store/images/Jem_Holograms_Pink-JrT.jpg

28. He-Man or She-Ra?
SHE-RA the princess of power!

29. What movie scared you the most?
Nothing really. make the wicked witch of the west from the wizard of oz...

30. Did you try to dance like Michael Jackson?
Nope didnt like him

31. What is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear "flux capacitor"?
nothing

32. What other colors did Pepsi come in?
pepsi is gross

33. Roger Rabbit or Howard The Duck?
Roger Rabbit

34. Did you ever beg your parents to have your school picture taken with the 'LASER' background?
Um i had that done automatically...

35. Do you know what the Ninja Rap is?
Nuuu

36. Do you know why people cringe when they hear the word BUCKNER?
well yeah because he screwed up for the 86 redsox.

37. Can you name the family members from the National Lampoon's Vacation movies?
Nope

38. Did you have pump sneakers?
no i wanted them for like 10 seconds.

39. Did you own HYPER COLOR shirts?
Nope

40. Did you watch Smurfs?
They were never my favorite, but I liked them alright. I liked gargomel. I've always been a fan of the villains...

fadedmemory @ 2008-02-13T15:29:00

2008-02-13T20:31:50Z

back from cheecahgo.
tired
didnt take a lot of pictures. too cold. too much snow. wind chill in the negs. had a nice time though. stayed with dixy (oh and her roomate ivy who i didnt care for at all >:o)

Yeah Bitches!

2008-01-09T19:24:48Z

I got my license!

rawr

fadedmemory @ 2007-11-30T19:51:00

2007-12-01T00:51:18Z

fadedmemory @ 2007-10-31T13:48:00

2007-10-31T17:49:45Z

I'm currently looking for a new job. My job has become...intollerable. I'm tired of losing myself when all I am to them is another mindless drone, simply there to make them even more wealthy. it's disgusting.

fadedmemory @ 2007-07-29T18:38:00

2007-07-29T22:38:07Z

Nothing left to save

2007-04-18T03:56:16Z

I used to care for wild things, and dreamed the biggest dreams of then. But now, s'my days grow longer and time depletes, I lack the desire to thrive against the pull, as the fellow draws near. And still those who've come before prosper, and my kinsmen do the same. But the darkness that consumes the core has swallowed and devoured it whole. with just nothing left to save.

fadedmemory @ 2006-09-17T04:42:00

2006-09-17T08:42:20Z

Middle Man

You are 45% White

Ok so you did pretty good on the test. Your score says you appreciate different cultures, but you cant hide your true self. Just like the pic, you roll with the cool crowd, but you still go home to your mommy and eat macaroni and cheese.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 31% on whiteness

Link: The How White Are You Test written by alleyandbrandon on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

fadedmemory @ 2005-12-14T14:13:00

2005-12-14T19:13:35Z

You Passed 8th Grade Science

Congratulations, you got 7/8 correct!

Could You Pass 8th Grade Science?

and i'm terrible at science.

go figure.

BAD Poems

2005-11-13T19:55:13Z

last breath
I've taken my last breath
there's truly nothing left
time squandered along the
damp moor
yet there is nothing left to offer
nothing left to save
the reality I see and feel
never truly existed at all
I've taken my last breath
and all I know is what I've missed
these last days are loney still
but worse are the nights never to come
I've taken my last breath
this I know for sure.

Camelot
Close your eyes
but for a moment
and the fear you had
could
dissapear.

The withered soul
left along the pavement
yearning
for a
revival
it wilst never receive

Betrayed.
the spirit knows
it needn't long to feel
because it is but nothing
in the world of the sinister

This is Camelot
they say
let it be thy undoing
or live vicariously through the unknown
whether it be true or not
no alternative has shown itself
to be cut of the same cloth
that bore the new day.

The truth
Mind Blank
Numb
One Soul
Destroyed by hate
Yearning to live
and Lie
under a moon lit sky
To search for purpose
She lacks everything she needs
for she is without hope
She has no sense of belonging,
because she never will
All that is left is her voice
But with every next breath,
It is slowly being silenced.
For the words she speaks
cut like a rusted knife.
Her words.
the truth.

Sepia
Like acid rain
on a hot summer night
they fall;
from sepia almonds
they fall;
like acid rain,
they burn the flesh
and penetrate the heart;
there is no light
in the midst of the dark
the pleas of the child
longing to live
or die
anything else
anything at all
except cry.

Pseudo-Corpse
Surreality
shocking pain
throughout her body
her soul is gone
Killed with every beat of her heart
her body longs to find it
but it to is dead
LIfeless
left along the pavement of
her broken heart
a life not lived
Predetorial
he swoops down
and sucks every last breath
from the pseudo-corpse
the lingering feeling of darkness
is all encompassing
As the body is trapped in a world of many dimensions
the pain is relevant in forms a plenty..
but none evident because they are disguised
inside
never exposed to the world
hidden deep within the walls and crevices of
this lost child
who is
longing
to feel alive
and dying
for her own
reneissance.

drops of rain
And though things remain the same..
the world,
ever changing...
like drops of rain.
Yet sitting here, I realize..
I've cried my last tear tonight,
for the things I can't bear to face tomorrow.

The Lament
the lonely lament
of an innocent sparrow
mashing its wings against
the dark, withered flesh
left strewn along the decaying wood
lifeless and limp it bears ill resemblance
to what it once was
no longer vivacious
nor filled with vibrant beauty
it is a mere shadow of the life it once inhabited
snuffed out before its time by the endless masses
of bitter sadistic cretins, who care nothing about anything
reality doth not play a part.
in the dark, twisted plot they lay.

Death
put him in the ground she did that day
an unecessary loss of life
put him in the ground she did that day
she felt as if she'd lost much more
part of herself was killed that day
as the cold and darkness consumed her
put him in the ground she did that day
with tears flowing down her cheeks
put him in the ground she did that day
roses lined along his casket
put him in the ground, we did that day
but she, most of all.

yay for bad poetry

fadedmemory @ 2005-11-03T00:13:00

2005-11-03T05:13:15Z

i might use this for poetry.
hm

thats an idea.